Gotta say,
kinda ran outta ideas for the
"Commemoration" issues. So about all I could think of that got
further than a couple lines was to recap my murder trial story found in
JABB 163.
Sometimes in a rather sarcastic manner. What I
did was go scene by scene and come up with lil synopses. If
you've not read that story but had intent to, probly don't read this
first as spoilers abound. Here goes:
Scene 1- JenniAnn, Jess, and stock characters scream about Andrew
potentially appearing on stage in a loin cloth. Adam arrives with
bad news. Andrew is in jail. Sadness ensues.
Scene 2- Monica and Andrew get fake last names. Monica writes an
article about Andrew's trial. It is not hugely supportive and
instead pretty objective. Yeah, that seems fitting for her...
Scene 3- Andrew and Adam chat. Andrew is sarcastic. I guess
prison life doesn't agree with him. Imagine that. FAN's
efforts are described. LJA has become a dispassionate Martha
Stewart.
Scene 4- Andrew sends a heartbreaking prayer to God. Mysterious
music fills the air. It is not Eric from "Phantom of the
Opera." Thank God.
Scene 5- Andrew is cheerier as he shows up for opening day of the
trial. But it turns out Eben, a demon, is the jury foreman.
Duh, duh, duh...
Scene 6- Adam reads one of Monica's articles aloud to the
Dyelanders. Everyone misses Andrew. The author throws in a
cameo by Lulu, Andrew's dog, to up the pathos level.
Scene 7- Gloria testifies. Tess gets annoyed. Adam coughs
and saves the day. Yay for coughing!
Scene 8- Andrew takes the stand and testifies beautifully.
Dyelanders are entranced. Andrew talks about prayer. Yay
God! The defense attorney (Sinclair) starts to crack.
Scene 9- An unknown woman runs
around the courtyard declaring Andrew's
guilt. Eben looks on... Muhahaha!
Scene 10- Sinclair tells the judge about the hysterical woman he wants
to introduce as a witness. Judge uses the word "darn." This
is apparently written before the "No swear words in JABB except 'damn'
cause Adam used it so it must be okay" rule went into place.
Scene 11- The judge okays the new witness outta concern about civil
unrest.
Scene 12- Another newspaper article from Monica. Hysterical woman
turns out to be the murder victim's girlfriend. Or was she???
Scene 13- Nope, Stella's in league with Eben. Drat.
Scene 14- Sinclair visits Andrew in jail. Andrew is beatific and
speaks admiringly of his friends. Sinclair is shaken and speaks
pessimistically. Then sees Andrew glow... More mysterious
music...
Scene 15- The verdict is in!!! Andrew's leather jacket makes a
cameo appearance!!! To up the handsomeness level!
Scene 16- Sinclair did it! Andrew gets his leather jacket back
and is swarmed by friends.
Scene 17- The verdict turns into a dove! Andrew visits Sinclair
in jail this time. He does his revelation scene. Sinclair
prays. Yay.
Scene 18- Turns out JenniAnn was playing the "Feather on the Breath of
God" CD for Andrew's benefit every night. Because she's a
sap. An unrequited sap.
Scene 19- Andrew is enthusiastically greeted by a party at Monica's
Cafe. Gloria rambles about amaretto. JenniAnn feels guilty
about the years of murder trial jokes. Andrew hugs her.
Aww. Monica hugs Andrew. Quick! Someone take a
photo! And she even gives him a thermos of orange juice and
ginger ale. There is hope!!! Adam does his Elvis
impersonation. Everyone parties. The End.
JABB
TOC
JABB 247
(The photographs
used on this page are from "Touched by an Angel" and owned by CBS
Productions, Caroline Productions, and Moon Water Productions.
They are not being used to seek profit.)