Click
Here to Listen to
"Johnny Angel"
Hello, it
is one of our goals here at JABB to not only amuse you but also build
an online community of people with a similar goal, mainly talking about
John Dye and Andrew as much as possible. So, there's really no better
way to draw people together than by sharing a common language. However,
since the majority of us do not have the time or ambition to create a
secret language, we are instead supplying you with a list of famous
proverbs, rewritten to showcase our distinctly A/J-centered community.
Enjoy!*
Next time
you're chatting with some friends and feel the need to recite a proverb
say:
1. "A
rolling Andrew gathers MANY dead."
2. "A John in the hand is worth Andrew in the bush".
3. "The
Andrew stops here"
4. "If you
can't stand the heat, get out of his glow."
5. "April
showers, and Tess is the only one with an umbrella."
6. "Keep John close, but Andrew closer."
7. "Trust
Andrew, Mr. Mulder."
8. "Speak softly and carry a drool bucket."
9. "If
wishes were Andrew then beggars might die."
10. "You
can't see Andrew through the AODs"
*We're sorry but JABB cannot be held responsible for any strange looks,
lost friendships, forced entry into an asylum, or any other problems
that may arise whilst using these proverbs among the general public.
Also, if you're not sure of the basis for these quotes you can check
the bottom of the newsletter.
Nine Reasons the Co-Prezes are Glad to be Getting a 9th Season
1. That
gives us at least one more year to refer to ourselves as Princesses and
talk about castles with out looking entirely ridiculous...
2. We're not particularly looking forward to moving onto the project we've committed to for after TBAA's series finale, starting the "People for the Protection and Appreciation of Carrot Top."
3. One more season of seeing John Dye every week, who can complain?!
4. At least 20 more opportunities to hear the words "God loves you."
5. Another
chance to hope against hope that there will be a murder
trial...
6. One more year to laugh at the people who teased us about "stupid TBAA" and have since seen their favorite shows yanked off the air.
7. At least one more year of writing "I spend my free time co-running a non-profit group to help people overcome their addictions" on our resumes. Very impressive sounding when they don't know that the addiction is merely one to a TV character and that we don't exactly help people...
8. With Andrew out of the picture we'd just be JBB, and we're not entirely sure how that would be pronounced.
9. We were,
frankly, at a loss on how to deal with a sad cancellation
in what *should* be a humorous newsletter.
Traditional
quotes:
1. This is
a charming alternative to the all-too-common "A rolling
stone gathers no moss."
2. "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush."
3. "The buck stops here."
4. This should be a lovely, all-purpose replacement for the cooking-oriented "If you can't stand the heat, get out of the kitchen."
5. A lovely, whimsical take on the classic but over-utilized "April showers bring May flowers."
6. Serves as a much more positive spin on "Keep your friends close, but your enemies closer."
7. Famous
TV shows lines can also be improved upon as with this far
more upbeat version of the traditional "Trust no one, Mr. Mulder."
8. Fine advice for anyone not particularly interested in carrying a "big stick."
9. This
will be far more useful than the equine "If wishes were horses
then beggars might ride."
10. Finally, #10 is sure to impress friends who have grown tired of "You can't see the tree through the forest."