Well, my mouse situation was not winding down when last I wrote... I've since done a bunch of stuff around the house and am hoping things are good now. However, that really cut into my writing time and, frankly, wore me down physically and emotionally. So rather than rushing to finish this story and churning out something I don't even really like, I'm just going to send what I have and add more over the coming days. I figure that'll also force me to sit down at points. It could be finished as soon as sometime on the 26th or, depending on my situation, might take until January 6th. We shall see!
I really hope each and every one of you are having a blessed holiday season! May 2024 bring you joy!
Merry Christmas!
God bless,
Jenni
PS- If you're interested, here's my Christmas 2023 Spotify playlist. It doesn't really figure into the story but thought I'd share.
PPS- So it's now January 4th and I've been dealing with breakthrough flu since the 30th. I will finish this story once I'm able to be coherent.
In the Winter Light
When JenniAnn entered the library, she took a few moments to admire Andrew as he read his book. The nearby lamp and Christmas tree perfectly illuminated his hair, making him look like the angel he was. She couldn't tell what he was reading but he had a dreamy, wistful look... so probably poetry.
In another moment, he proved her theory correct as he read aloud.
"'She walks in beauty, like the night
Of cloudless climes and starry skies;
And all that’s best of dark and bright
Meet in her aspect and her eyes.'"
Of cloudless climes and starry skies;
And all that’s best of dark and bright
Meet in her aspect and her eyes.'"
Andrew beamed at JenniAnn then set the book down on a nearby table.
JenniAnn needed no further invitation than his expectant smile. She approached, straddled his lap, and rested her forehead against his.
"You really could have been a Literature professor in another life. And thus proved true the the saying that women marryish men... ish... like their... godfathers."
Andrew chuckled.
"Not sure that's exactly the way it goes... but thank you, Laja. You do look especially beautiful this morning though slightly flushed. Is something wrong?"
"Wrong? No." JenniAnn snuck a kiss before proceeding. "Kids are off to the zoo in El-Chanan with Mom and Dad... who have thoughts on Christmas this year."
"Thoughts?"
JenniAnn nodded.
"Thing is... when I was little we used to go stay at my Grandma's and Grandpa's house for a night or two before Christmas. Even though we all lived in town. So... they want that. But they understand that we have too many obligations around here so... they were thinking maybe we could stay at their place the weekend before? So like December 16th and 17th."
"We..." Andrew echoed.
JenniAnn's face flushed. They had initially said they wanted Christmas with their "baby girl and their grandkids." And she didn't think they'd intended to exclude Andrew. But it was also clear he was far from top billing in their minds.
"Okay, admittedly, it seems to be more about the kids but... when I asked where they intended to put us all, they said that if Max and Rose can swing it, they can stay in the basement suite with the kids. Belle and Avi could sleep in the living room on the couches. The girls could have the room across from my old one and... we could have my room, of course."
"So... they do want me there?"
JenniAnn cradled Andrew's chin and peered into his eyes.
"Truthfully, they're not as excited about you as they are the kids. You're just not as cute in that particular way... though very cute in the other way that specifically appeals to me."
Andrew chuckled.
"But, of course they intend for you to be there! If for no other reason than they don't want to watch me pine away for two days."
"Laja..."
"I absolutely would." JenniAnn kissed him again. "But, really, they know we're a package deal. 'They are a pair, do not separate.'"
"So they don't want to see me standing outside their house holding a boombox over my head?"
JenniAnn burst out laughing.
"They would be so mortified. But I wouldn't let that happen. So..."
"So I think we should probably do it. I mean... I know how much it means to us when Rose and Max and the kids are over. Although..."
"Although?"
Andrew's face flushed.
"Just feel a little awkward about staying with you in your teenage bedroom."
"Well, technically, you already have. I was a teenager when I started staying here, after all. Our room *is* one of my teenage bedrooms."
"But that just feels different. It doesn't involved the cast of Friends staring at me, judging me over the rims of their coffee mugs."
JenniAnn snorted.
"I will take the poster down beforehand. Promise. Frankly, it unnerves me a little, too. Not sure why I ever wanted to sleep in a room with six total strangers staring at me."
"Even without the poster..." Andrew shrugged. "I'll go. I definitely will. But just the idea of sleeping in your bedroom in your parents' house..."
"It's kinda awkward, yeah... Not to mention I'm a little worried your feet are gonna hang off the bed. It's not nearly as big as ours!"
Andrew chuckled.
"I'll make due. So... yeah, we can do that. I think it could be fun."
JenniAnn hugged Andrew tightly.
"Thank you. And if it really gets too weird, not like we can't come home at night through the portal."
"True. But I think we'll be fine. I can understand your parents just wanting a weekend of everyone under their roof. I get it."
"Me too."
Andrew caressed JenniAnn's face and kissed her then smiled.
"But I really mean it about the poster..."
Laughing, JenniAnn nodded.
"I'll do it later today even."
"Thank you."
"You're welcome. Wouldn't want you to be jealous, after all. Though I clearly snagged the best real life version of a 90s TV character." JenniAnn nuzzled Andrew's neck. "You are worth a hundred Joeys, Chandlers, and Rosses."
Andrew began to softly knead her back.
"A thousand even."
JenniAnn let out a soft moan as Andrew hit a particularly tense spot.
"A million... Even a million Mikes."
"Mike? Who was Mike?"
"Paul Rudd's character. He was dreamy. But not as dreamy as you."
"I dunno... Paul Rudd's pretty great looking. And he doesn't age. Maybe he's secretly an angel."
JenniAnn laughed.
"Pretty sure he's from New Jersey and that he's fathered children but we can ask Joshua when he comes for Christmas."
Andrew chuckled.
"I mean... if He can create an angel from cherry blossoms or from our emotions then I think he can create one from New Jersey. But you're right. Humans get to claim Paul Rudd."
JenniAnn continued to laugh.
"Would you like me to put up a Paul Rudd poster? Although I'm like 99.9% positive that he's in a collage Carrie made me in high school of an assortment of actors and musicians we had crushes on. I think it's still on one of my shelves."
"No poster, thanks. But I'm very interested in this collage... for research purposes."
JenniAnn again rested her forehead against Andrew's.
"Very well then. But just know that if Carrie had had access to photos of you... I woulda asked for a collage just of them... okay and maybe just one of Paul Rudd."
Andrew grinned.
"I woulda been honored to cede a spot to Mr. Rudd."
JenniAnn giggled then rested her head on Andrew's shoulder.
"So what shall we do with our child-free day, Mr. Darcy?"
"Probably should get going on our shopping, Ms. Chandler. But... let's just sit for a few minutes more, hmm?"
JenniAnn snuggled closer and sighed as Andrew's arms tightened around her.
"Happily," she murmured.
The two snuggled together quietly in the glow of the tree and their love for each other.
*~*~*
Saturday, December 16th, 2023
Andrew surveyed the pile of luggage near the front door of the castle and chuckled. Based on the size, one wouldn't think they were only going to be gone for two days... and with access to a portal the whole time.
"Ready to load up, Dad?" Max asked as he approached.
"Yeah, guess we better. Could take a while." Andrew glanced at his pocket watch. "And we're due there in half an hour."
Max smirked.
"I doubt Allison and Robert are expecting down to the minute punctuality. Maja can text them if we're running late."
"Yeah. I suppose."
Max studied his father for a moment then hugged him.
"There's no reason to be nervous."
Andrew smiled as he returned the hug. He should have known better than to think he'd be able to hide from the keenly observant psychiatrist.
"I know. It's just weird." The angel dragged a hand through his hair. "It's like... I guess the closest equivalent to what I am to them is a son-in-law. But I'm older than the oldest branch on their family tree! And I've always known that. But spending the weekend where Laja grew up... surrounded by photos of her as a kid... I was never a kid."
"No. But normally that doesn't bother you. Why do you think it is so much now?"
Andrew shrugged.
"I don't know... Maybe just that it's Christmas. Things have been really good between Allison and Robert and me for a few years now. But it wasn't always that way and I don't want to contribute to bad Christmas memories for anyone."
"You're not going to! I'm sure they'll be on their best behavior. They don't want to make things weird for their daughter or grandkids any more than you do, Dad. So please... take a deep breath."
Smiling sheepishly, Andrew complied.
"And another."
Andrew inhaled and exhaled slowly again.
"One more," Max coached.
Andrew breathed again then rolled his shoulders.
"All right. Better. Now let's get this stuff in the van. Thanks for helping, Max... with the packing up and... the breathing."
Max chuckled and hugged Andrew again.
"Of course! And, just remember, if you need a breather and don't feel right coming back here, you're welcome in the basement. Or we could go out for a drink or something."
Andrew clapped Max on the back.
"I'll remember that, thanks."
"You're very welcome. Now... holy cow! What did Violeta pack!?"
Andrew laughed.
"No idea. I don't hear any baaing so at least we know it's not a sheep."
"Probably just too many clothes then. Oh well!"
With more laughter, the two worked together to cram everything into the van.
*~*~*
A little over a half hour later, the Jolly Green pulled into Allison and Robert Chandler's driveway. Andrew had no sooner parked than the van's back doors flew open and Belle rushed out followed by Shelby and Violeta.
"Can I go?" Avi asked.
JenniAnn quickly perused the nearby area. The neighborhood was quiet but it still made her nervous.
"Can you wait just one sec? I'll get out first and then you can help your old mama in case it's icy."
"Okay!"
Andrew squeezed JenniAnn's hand then watched her exit the car and lift the five-year-old down. Once he was on his feet, Avi dutifully took his mother's hand and walked her to the front porch where Allison and Robert were gushing over his sisters.
"Is there enough room for you to get out with the car seats or are you gonna leave them in?" Andrew asked Max and Rose.
"Yeah, there's room. We'll leave Landon's but I'll carry Amelia in in hers. She's fast asleep," Rose answered.
"Is it icy or did Maja just say that?" Max checked.
"Maybe just along the edges of the sidewalk. But not really elsewhere. I'll walk with you just in case. We'll come back for the stuff."
With that decided, Max and Rose exited the van with their kids while Andrew walked protectively behind them.
"Merry Christmas! Welcome! Welcome!" Allison greeted. "Oh... I should quiet down. Sweet Amelia..."
Rose laughed.
"Trust me, she's a deep sleeper. It's fine. Hi! Thanks for having us."
"Of course!"
"Landon, how you doing, young man?" Robert asked.
Landon shyly clung to his father's leg but answered.
"Good. Excited."
"Very good! Because we have lots of fun plans. Andrew, how about I help you unload the van? I can only imagine how much stuff is in there if your girls take after JenniAnn."
"Dad!"
Andrew chuckled. It wasn't untrue...
"Thank you. I'd appreciate the help."
"Robert, let him sit for a bit!" Allison countered.
"No, no. It's fine, really," Andrew assured. "I'd feel better getting everything inside."
"If you're sure..."
"I am. Thanks!" Andrew hastily and somewhat awkwardly hugged Allison before following Robert to the van. Once he opened the back, Robert gaped.
"Yep... They take after their mother."
With a laugh, Andrew nodded.
"Just a little... I'm glad Max brought the bigger pieces for his kids over earlier. I don't think they would have fit."
"No... Someone would have definitely been riding with a pack-and-play on their lap." Robert grabbed a couple of bags.
Max returned to help and, in no time, the bags were inside and being carted off to their owners' rooms.
When Andrew hauled his and JenniAnn's suitcase to her old bedroom, he immediately noticed two things. First, the Friends poster was, indeed, gone. Second, there were two festively colored piles on the bed.
JenniAnn walked in and followed Andrew's gaze.
"Yeah, so... Mom just told me she's very into the idea of getting a full-family Christmas jammies photo so..."
Andrew watched as JenniAnn picked the pajamas up. Both sets featured candy cane striped bottoms. His T-shirt was designed to look like an elf shirt while JenniAnn's longer one looked like an elf dress.
"And there are hats..." JenniAnn put one on Andrew and giggled. "Adorable..."
"Laja... Look at how tight those pants are!"
"Yeah, they're leggings."
"Which is great for you but..."
JenniAnn looped her arms around Andrew's neck and smiled coquettishly.
"What? You have great legs. I happen to be very fond of them."
In spite of his unease, Andrew blushed and smiled.
"Thank you. I just hope the T-shirt is long enough."
"Andrew..." JenniAnn's hands moved to cradle his face. "I'm sure it is. No one is going to make indecent matching family Christmas pajamas. But... I know this isn't really about the pajamas. You're not here to prove yourself. You've done that. Again and again and again. If anything, it's my parents who need to prove themselves by showing you a good time and making you feel like the treasured member of the family you are. Okay?"
Andrew nuzzled her hair and nodded.
"Okay. And I'm sorry. For being so tightly wound. Because the truth is... even if the pajamas were indecent and even if your parents weren't warming to me... I'm still with you. And with the kids. And... and that makes this a great Christmas. One of my best. Just like they all have been since..." Andrew sighed and reached out for a framed photo of JenniAnn with Carrie and some other friends in their high school graduation gowns. "Since some seventeen-year-old decided to write a song about me."
JenniAnn beamed.
"And those have been my happiest Christmases, too. The ones I got to spend with my anam cara."
The two shared a quick kiss before Violeta and Shelby came tromping in.
"Your room is so cute!" the former gushed. "Every time we're here, I think about how I would have loved living here."
"I mean... it looks a lot like our room, doesn't it?" Shelby pointed out. "Right down to the tie-dyed velvet pillows over there."
"You have a purple one..." Violeta pointed out.
JenniAnn laughed.
"You can take the purple one home. And, yes, it was a very nice room. But you should all be glad I didn't stay here because, if I had, no Willowveil."
Shelby hugged JenniAnn.
"I can't imagine no Willowveil... It was a great place to grow up. So many hiding places."
JenniAnn chuckled and kissed her hair.
"Which you sometimes took full advantage of. Our little spy."
Andrew laughed at the memories.
"Shoulda known back then that you were going to be a writer, Shel. Always observing."
"I wish I'd been there..." Violeta pouted.
Shelby released JenniAnn and hugged the angel.
"It mighta been fun. But we also would probably have a totally different relationship if you had. You woulda been a lot older seeming. I like that we're kinda peer-like."
Violeta smiled at that.
"True. I like that, too. I like that we can be big sisters together. Speaking of the littles... Allison told me that we're going to a drive-through lights display this evening. And you can meet Santa but since that's touchy with Avi, they're telling the kids we have our own visit with Santa aka Adam here... so we can take photos with him in our Christmas jammies."
"So Adam is coming here while..." Andrew's voice trailed off as he looked over at his and JenniAnn's pajamas.
JenniAnn giggled.
"Oooh..." Violeta directed her attention to JenniAnn's closet. "After we've taken the jammies photo, can Shel and I look through your old clothes?"
"Sure... though there's certainly not anything new. You've already picked through it numerous times."
"But styles come back and our tastes change a bit so... ooh... Velvet overalls!" Shelby cried.
"Well, I mean, not actual velvet but, yeah, that was a thing." JenniAnn approached the closet and pulled out a tight-fitting striped shirt. "I'd usually wear it with something like this. A lot of the girls went with crop tops but... I wasn't brave enough."
As JenniAnn continued to recount her fashion adventures, Andrew sat down on the edge of the bed. He briefly rubbed his temples.
This was going to be a very weird evening.
*~*~*
After their drive through the holiday lights display, the family returned to the house. Allison hurried everyone to their rooms to change into their pajamas before Santa came over for a lasagna dinner... and cookies and milk, of course.
As Andrew tugged his shirt over his head, JenniAnn giggled.
"There. You look perfectly elfish," she complimented.
Andrew shook his head.
"You look perfect." He playfully tugged the ponytails she'd just styled. "I look..." He grimaced at the mirror. "Like I'm going to rip a seam."
"Okay, so maybe the shirt is a little tight... definitely not made for a carpenter with all that upper body strength. But it's long enough. And I certainly don't mind the look..." JenniAnn nestled against Andrew's chest and run a hand up and down his torso. "Thank you for doing this. I know it's goofy but... it's important to Mom for some reason. I did tell her they can't be, like, next year's Christmas cards or anything. I'm still steamed about Veronica saying we should look into electrolysis for Avi. He's perfect the way he is. But we don't need to invite comment from relations we don't particularly care about."
"He is perfect. I can't imagine him any other way. None of our kids. And you don't have to thank me. I meant what I said. This is a great Christmas. I'm just..." Andrew sighed. "Awkward with this stuff."
"I mean... that's fair. When you think back, in the early days, we spent a lot more time around your family than..."
JenniAnn was interrupted by a triple knock from her closet door.
"Ho! Ho! Ho!"
JenniAnn flung the door open to find Adam standing there in full Santa gear.
"How long have you been in there?!" she exclaimed.
Andrew rubbed at his temples and sighed.
"Long enough to hear that Andrew's awkward." Adam clapped his fellow angel of death on the back. "He is. But you..." He brought JenniAnn's hand to his lips. "You are a very fetching elf, sis."
JenniAnn laughed and hugged him.
"Thank you. And you are a very handsome Santa, as always."
"Thanks! And I am sorry about this." Adam sobered. "I thought the portal was in a hall closet, not your bedroom. Figured it'd be more magical than having an Uber drop me off at the front door but..." He hugged Andrew. "Sorry. And I don't blame you for being awkward. Christmas with the in-laws... so to speak."
Seeing a chance to give Andrew a little space and time to vent, JenniAnn headed to the door.
"How about I go out there and check to see how everything's coming along? Then once I know everyone's ready for Santa's big entrance, I'll come get Andrew and give you a two minute warning, Adam. Sound good?"
"Sounds great," Adam agreed.
Andrew squeezed her hand.
"Thanks, Laja. See you in a bit."
"Absolutely." JenniAnn kissed his cheek then left the room, closing the door behind her.
"I really am sorry. I should have texted but I was trying to surprise you two, too. Which I guess I did..." Adam apologized.
Andrew shook his head.
"No, no. It's fine. I appreciate that you wanted to make it special for the kids. I really do. This is for them. And... I'm fine. I don't know why I feel so... on edge." Andrew dragged a hand through his hair again.
"Okay... well, let's try to get to the bottom of that." Adam waved for Andrew to sit on the edge of the bed with him.
"I suppose... as the dad of a teen girl now... I can't help but relate to Allison and Robert as they were when JenniAnn was Shel's age. And while I know nothing inappropriate went on..."
"Which I can attest to," Adam reminded. "I was right there for a lot of it."
Andrew nodded.
"I know how it probably looked to them. And when it came up it was always 'No, I'm an angel. I can't fall in love. No worries.' But what were they supposed to think when Laja and I suddenly had a kid and were living together? What if they think I was lying?"
"You've never talked to them about this?"
"No..."
"You probably should. And maybe this is your opportunity. But you weren't lying, Andrew. I still don't think 'fall in love' fits. Because you can't... we can't... fall out of love. But I realize that's just semantics. None of us knew about the anam cara thing at the time. And I understand why. Why would God plant that idea before it was relevant? He'd have a bunch of angels running around wondering where their anam caras were when the vast majority don't have one beyond Him. Not to mention... if you had known when JenniAnn was seventeen... that's when things might have gotten inappropriate, even unintentionally. You and JenniAnn both acted with the best intentions with the information you had at the time. And think of it this way..." Adam bumped his shoulder against Andrew's. "It was the two of you who Joshua used to introduce the anam cara concept to our group. He wouldn't have done that unless he saw a lot of goodness there... and knew the rest of us did, too. You think I would have been happy to discover Kylie and Clay were mine if you and JenniAnn had been a dumpster fire?"
Andrew chuckled.
"I saw that it was good... that the two angel/human anam caras that I knew of were happy, loved each other... loved being together. That gave me peace. And I'm sure it did for Monica and Takoda and now for Ed... not to mention your kids who you sheltered in that love. Anyway, sure, Allison and Robert may still be confused. But there's no way that, at this point, they can't see that the end result was good. So calm down. That's an order from Santa."
Andrew hugged Adam.
"Thanks. I will. And you're right. I should talk to them. But for right now..." Andrew grabbed his elf cap and put it on.
Adam straightened it for him.
"We've got some kids to amuse," he finished. "And photos to take. And lasagna to eat... and cookies and milk."
Andrew nodded.
"Thanks for doing this. Means a lot. Laja and I... we're still not sure how to handle things with Avi sometimes. We don't want him to feel hidden away and yet..."
Adam wrapped an arm around Andrew's shoulders.
"You'll figure it out with some guidance." He glanced above. "You always do. But I'm glad Allison and Robert arranged this. I'm sure the other guy is a perfectly good Santa but... I figure I don't have much longer before Belle figures out that Santa is just her goofy old uncle."
Andrew heaved a sigh and shook his head in disbelief.
"My baby girl is almost ten. Double digits..."
The two laughed when they looked at each other and realized they were both misty eyed.
JenniAnn knocked on the door.
"Love, Mom just heard that Santa's gonna be here in two minutes. Wanna come downstairs and wait with us?"
Andrew and Adam exchanged a quick hug before the former rose to join JenniAnn.
"Absolutely."
Adam waved and smiled at the couple before they closed the door so he could properly move into Santa-mode.
*~*~*
The End
The next hour flew by,
leaving Andrew little time to be contemplative... with the
exception of a few moments when he caught Belle eyeing
"Santa" and he wondered if she was putting the pieces
together. However, if the little girl was beginning
to suspect the old man wasn't so much a magical immortal
as an angelic one, she gamely played along for Avi who was
over-the-moon. He'd obviously spent time with Santa
before... but never a whole dinner and dessert with just
him and his family!
After photos were taken, Adam made a show of going back upstairs where he galloped around, hoping to mimic the sound of reindeer preparing to depart whilst playing a recording of sleigh bells. Once he was gone, the family settled into the living room to watch Elf, as chosen by Belle and Avi... everyone except Shelby and Violeta who laid claim to JenniAnn's closet.
Allison fussed over her guests, ensuring they all had what they wanted.
"Andrew, can I get you some egg nog?" she offered.
"Yes, please! That'd be great."
"With or without rum?"
Andrew considered for a moment then cast a look at the staircase which Violeta and Shelby had scurried up.
"Rum, please."
"Coming right up!"
JenniAnn's eye brows raised.
"I had no idea you drank rum."
Andrew shrugged.
"Sometimes."
"You know, I've never seen you drunk. I guess maybe I thought you couldn't be but, well, that incident with Monica... And I saw Crowley drunk."
Before Andrew could answer, Shelby and Violeta came twirling into the room. The former was wearing a very familiar blue crushed velvet dress while the latter was sporting gray corduroy overalls paired with a pink thermal shirt under a maroon flannel one.
"Tonight just might be the night..." Andrew replied.
JenniAnn playfully elbowed him.
"I think you'll be sick to your stomach from the sweetness before the rum would ever hit. Mom doesn't make them very strong."
"What do you think!?" Violeta asked.
"Very 90s cool!" JenniAnn praised, moving to be closer to the girls. "The only thing you're both missing is a choker. We can make some when we're home. Shel... That fits you perfectly! I think I wore that my first Christmas in Asteriana."
"You did," Andrew confirmed, remembering the much smaller group who had gathered in the Willowveil ballroom for candlelit caroling.
"Here you go, dear!" Allison returned and handed the angel his drink.
"Thank you, Allison." Misty-eyed, Andrew took a sip.
"Mama... Come sit with me," Belle pleaded.
"Okay, baby. Just a sec." JenniAnn squeezed Shelby's and Violeta's hands. "You can keep playing dress up if you'd like but I'm gonna sit down. Just try to keep the room tidy enough for Andrew and I to sleep, okay?"
"Okay!" Violeta and Shelby replied in unison before hurrying back up the stairs.
JenniAnn noticed Andrew looking maudlin and reclaimed her seat beside him.
"Come here, Belle. You can snuggle with Daddy and me."
Belle wedged herself between her parents while Avi cuddled up against Andrew's side.
"Ready?" Max asked as he pulled out the DVD.
"Ready!" the others answered.
With that, Max started the movie.
As it began, Andrew took another sip of his egg nog then looked around the room. Everyone looked so cozy and happy. He glanced back over at JenniAnn.
They had come so far in twenty three years...
Avi took Andrew's left hand in both of his.
"It's okay, Daddy. Buddy will find his family," he encouraged.
Andrew smiled at the little boy.
"Thanks, bud."
Avi gave him a relieved smile then focused on the movie, silently urging his dad to do the same.
As JenniAnn had predicted, Andrew was very much sober by the time the two finally returned to their room once Avi and Belle were asleep and Max and his family were well on their way. Shelby and Violeta would be up for a while yet but were definitely not in need of supervision.
Once they were in bed, JenniAnn cuddled up to Andrew and gently stroked his chest.
"What's wrong now?"
Andrew startled.
"Nothing's wrong."
"You can maybe fool everyone else. But not me. Elf has some sentimental moments, sure. But you looked on the verge of tears for practically the whole movie, love. Was it the girls messing around with my clothes?"
"Maybe... a little bit, at least. I dunno... I know they're both strong, resourceful young women. But... they don't really act their age, do they? Not that I think that's bad!" Andrew hastened to add when JenniAnn gave him a look. "I love it. I'm in no hurry for them to fly the coop, believe me. And I love it for them. But just seeing them in your clothes... especially Shelby who looks so much like you... it just hit me that I don't remember you ever looking that carefree, Laja. Do you ever think... I know I didn't mean to but... do you ever feel like maybe I kind of... inadvertently stole your teenage years?"
JenniAnn made a sound that was half-laugh and half-sob.
"What?!" she finally choked out.
"I just mean... you were seventeen... eighteen... and here's this angel of death making regular visits with news of war and disease and abuse and..."
"Okay, first of all, you're forgetting how difficult it was to actually get anything out of you back then. With a precious few exceptions, most of the information I got was just in the form of you confirming whether a particular Touched episode was inspired by a real case or not... which means I was getting info weeks if not months late. But, no, I wasn't a carefree teenager. But that was because I was trying to help grow a community, Andrew! And that would have been the case regardless of whether you were around. It just would have been a whole heckuva lot more difficult without you to share that burden. But I don't regret any of it. If not for those early years, where would we be raising our family? Would we even have a family? So, sure, maybe I get a little wistful seeing Shel and Violeta and their prolonged childhood. But it makes me proud! All good parents sacrifice to make their children's lives more comfortable than their own. And we did that. Together! Before we even knew kids were in the cards. Or this..."
Andrew smiled as JenniAnn kissed him.
"Okay, yeah, I see that now..." he conceded. "And I'm proud of us, too."
"Good. And, for the record, if you did anything to my teenagehood it was prolong it. I mean wasn't it you who picked Crowley and me up at the mall last week after we'd ambled around Hot Topic and then got boba tea? If that's not teenagehood, I dunno what is."
Andrew laughed.
"That was me..."
"Yup. And, also for the record, I can totally understand how trippy tonight was for you. It's a lil surreal for me, too... watching my mini-me parade around in my clothes with the angel of death in training that I helped mother and raise. It sounds absolutely wild. But... that's just part of being a parent. You watch your kids become you kinda. Before Max had really made it on his own, it was kinda weird for me to see him borrowing your suits for interviews and exams and such. It was just... it felt like one day he was a kid and then suddenly he was a mini-you. A grown-up."
Andrew's eyes filled again.
JenniAnn rested her head on his chest for a moment then leaned up and stroked his face.
"I know this weekend has brought up a lot for you... but I suspect that's somewhere at the root of it. It must be weird to, all at once, be very glad that I'm no longer seventeen and yet... want desperately to freeze time and keep Shel and Violeta exactly as they are."
Andrew nodded then nuzzled JenniAnn's hair.
"I feel like I'm long overdue for a talk with your parents but... yeah. Now that you say that... It's a weird tension. I'm glad their daughter is a grown-up woman... but I would prefer mine stay children."
JenniAnn laughed softly.
"Exactly. That's the hypocrisy of being a parent, I guess. You're glad you and your partner grew up despite your parents' wishes and yet... you want to hang onto your own kids and keep them from doing the same. And I imagine that impulse is especially strong with all you see, Andrew. And... we've all spent the last year taking turns accompanying Christina to court... a constant reminder of the ugliness out there. But..." JenniAnn intertwined her fingers with Andrew's then brought his hand to her lips. "There's also a lot of beauty. All that being said... I don't think Shel and Violeta are going anywhere far without us for a good while."
"No... probably not with the way they've been nesting in their room for the past year and a half." Andrew brushed his lips against JenniAnn's temple. "Maybe we should get them the guinea pigs they've been hinting at wanting..."
JenniAnn smirked.
"You said no more animals."
"I can change my mind..."
JenniAnn beamed at the angel.
"Let's sleep on it. How ya doing with the bed?"
Andrew stretched, showing that his feet hung off the bed.
"Aww, sorry!"
Andrew smiled and shook his head then rearranged himself so he was curled around JenniAnn.
"It's okay. I'm actually a lot more comfortable than I thought I'd be."
"Good. Me too. Now... try to sleep well, okay? But wake me up if you need anything."
"Okay but I'm sure I'll be fine. G'night, Laja. I love you."
"I love you, too."
Then with a kiss, and to the faint sounds of Violeta and Shelby chatting across the hall, the two fell asleep.
It was still dark out when Andrew awoke to a cramp in his right calf. Wincing, he did his best to stretch it out but the ache remained. Had he been at Willowveil, he would have gone to the kitchen to get a banana. He considered going through the portal to get one but that felt stupid. Allison and Robert had told them to make themselves at home. They'd probably be offended if they realized he'd gone through the portal, trekked through the yard, retrieved a banana from Willowveil, and trekked back all while a bunch of perfectly ripe bananas sat on their counter.
And so, after carefully extricating himself from JenniAnn's embrace and the bed, Andrew tossed on his robe and made his way down the stairs as quietly as possible. While he was checking on Avi and Belle who were sleeping soundly on the couches, Andrew realized that the kitchen light was on and someone was already up. After another few moments, he could make out Allison's and Robert's voices. He considered going back upstairs but likely they'd heard him come down... and hadn't Adam told him to speak to them, anyway?
"Here goes..." Andrew murmured to himself. He glanced briefly towards the ceiling and whispered a prayer then entered the kitchen.
"Andrew, good morning!" Allison greeted. "It's only 5:30 but can't say I'm surprised to see you. Can I get you anything?"
"Good morning." Andrew smiled at her and Robert. "And a banana would be great, thanks. Dealing with the aftermath of a charlie horse."
"I worried that bed was too small," Robert reported. "Sorry about that."
"No, no! Oh thanks." Andrew accepted a banana from Allison before continuing. "Happens sometimes at home, too. Getting older." He chuckled.
"And... and how's that been?" Allison asked.
Andrew swallowed his first bite of banana then shrugged.
"Not always fun... but I wouldn't have it any other way. It's what needed to happen to give the kids a normal life. JenniAnn, too."
"It was a big sacrifice to make," Allison murmured.
Andrew shook his head.
"I guess I don't really see it that way. Feels like it woulda been a bigger sacrifice to have to deal with people wondering why Belle's dad still looks like a thirty five year old walking her down the aisle. Stuff like that. And I, umm, didn't want people whispering sexist nonsense years from now like JenniAnn being a cougar when, umm, we all know... well, that couldn't be further from the truth."
Robert laughed.
"No... it couldn't be."
Andrew blushed.
"I... I've been thinking... and... I'm sorry. For any confusion I caused you, or JenniAnn for that matter, when this all started. Or before it started or..." The angel dragged a hand through his hair. "All that 'I can't fall in love' stuff and then... I didn't mean to be dishonest. I didn't know..."
Allison's hand shot across the table and took Andrew's fumbling one.
"Andrew... stop. We know. I mean... we don't entirely understand. But I guess we figured it was something like when JenniAnn told us she was asexual. It's not that we think she was lying when she said she was straight for all those years. She just didn't know. It's something she had to discover about herself. And we didn't even know about asexuality in humans."
"I just thought it was a type of reproduction in simple organisms," Robert added.
"Exactly. So if it took JenniAnn a while to figure out she was asexual, I think it makes sense that it took you a while to figure out that you're... well, whatever you are," Allison offered kindly.
Andrew smiled and squeezed her hand.
"Thanks. I really appreciate that. And I am asexual. All angels are. It was just the romance piece... I didn't know about anam caras. If I had... I would have said some things differently. But I'm also glad I didn't know because I wouldn't have wanted to put that expectation on JenniAnn when she was younger because... the truth is I don't know when exactly things changed for me and... and I just wanted her to have a normal life without worrying about me and..."
"And you were never going to be able to do that, Andrew," Allison interrupted. "She loved you. She was always going to worry about you. That's not on you."
Robert sighed and abandoned the potatoes he'd been peeling so he could join his wife and Andrew at the table.
"Listen, I'm not going to pretend that that didn't sometimes bother us. It did. But Allison is right. JenniAnn was going to fret over you no matter what you did or didn't do. That's just the truth. And here's some more truth... I know we haven't always shown it... and we've said and done some things in the past that we shouldn't have but... we are grateful. For you. JenniAnn's never called her mother in tears because you said something hurtful. She's never had to vent because you weren't helping out around the house or with the kids. The kids haven't called us crying because mom and dad are fighting. Half of our friends have had kids return home after a break-up or divorce. More than one has had to sneak their kid out in the middle of the night because of an abusive relationship. But we've never had to do any of that. You've just always been... exactly who our kid needs. And who your kids need. And so... thank you."
A few tears rolled down Andrew's cheeks.
Allison patted his hand.
"We haven't forgotten how you stood up for JenniAnn... against us... when we stayed with you during COVID lockdown. We needed that wake-up call. We know that you feel nervous around us, Andrew. And the fact that you risked making things even more awkward between us because it was more important that JenniAnn be well... that speaks very highly of you. I don't suspect Robert and I will ever fully understand what you two share. But we don't need to to know it's right. And it's holy. And we're grateful that our not-so-little any more girl has that."
Andrew attempted to get out a thank you but was interrupted by a sob.
"Aww, dear..." Allison wrapped her arms around him as Robert patted his shoulder.
And that was the scene JenniAnn walked in on.
"Umm... G'morning... Should I be concerned? Angry? Happy?" she queried.
Andrew gained control of himself enough to laugh and reach out for her.
"Happy, Laja. We just had a long overdue talk."
"Aww... good."
Allison got out of the way so JenniAnn could sit beside Andrew.
"We just talked about how I can understand if I confused them by saying I couldn't fall in love and then, well..."
"And we told Andrew that despite our initial distrust... which we admit lingered for far too long... we are grateful to him. We love him," Allison added.
Andrew sniffled.
"Love you, too... Thanks."
"Of course! And... I think it's time we tell you about the early Christmas present we got you both," Robert tantalized.
Allison clapped her hands happily.
"For starters... We bought some gingerbread house kits to keep the kiddos occupied tonight. And we've talked to Max and Rose and they're very happy to stay here and help out. As for you... We got you a hotel room near the Old Market. We thought you could go have a nice dinner, walk around a bit to admire the lights, and then have a night to yourselves."
"With a king bed," Robert added.
"Oh..." JenniAnn's eyes filled. "I... I love that. Thank you!" She stood up to hug both her parents.
Once again too moved to speak, Andrew silently hugged them, too.
"Well, we remember how hard it sometimes was to find quality time together... and we only had the one kid! You have five and two grandkids!" Allison pointed out.
"And Marty." Robert gave them a quizzical frown. "We still don't understand Marty."
Andrew, at last, was able to speak. He started with a chuckle.
"I'll ask him to stop by to explain himself sometime. In the meantime... thank you both. This..." He beamed over at JenniAnn. "This is the perfect Christmas present. Time."
"Well, it's not entirely unselfish. It also gives us alone time with the kids," Robert pointed out. "But we hope you have a really nice time. I know this one used to find the Old Market to be hopelessly romantic." He playfully tweaked JenniAnn's hair.
"It is so pretty and magical..." JenniAnn hugged her dad again. "We will, of course, have to bring fudge back."
Allison laughed.
"Yes, afraid so. I think Violeta might disown you otherwise. But speaking of food... we better get back to work, Robert."
"Put us to work, too!" JenniAnn insisted.
Andrew nodded.
"Absolutely."
"Well... I suppose you could start cutting up the fruit?" Allison suggested.
"Happily," Andrew agreed as JenniAnn nodded.
With that, the four settled down to their various tasks, happily talking about their plans for the upcoming Christmas week.
That evening, JenniAnn stood in her old bedroom, eyeing her reflection. Among their many finds, Violeta and Shelby had fixated on a purple cocktail dress that they had then insisted she could and should still wear. JenniAnn had put it on just to get them to let it go but now... she found she rather liked the look.
"Can we come see?!" Violeta shouted through the door.
With a smirk, JenniAnn opened the door and let the angel and Shelby in.
"Well?"
"You look so cute!" Shelby gushed. "And it does fit perfectly! Told you so!"
Violeta sniffled and nodded before hugging JenniAnn.
"So pretty... Please say you'll wear it tonight? Andrew's gonna love it."
"I mean... I guess I might as well. You're sure I don't look like I'm trying too hard to look young?" JenniAnn fretted.
"No way!" Shelby gave a resolute shake of her head.
"I think it looks perfectly age appropriate," Violeta agreed.
"Okay, if you're sure..."
A knock on the closet door revealed that Andrew had returned from a stop at Willowveil to grab some nicer clothes.
"Can I come out?"
"Yep."
Andrew stepped out of the closet wearing a dark suit with a purple shirt and a tie of a slightly darker shade.
"Laja..." He admired her.
"We match..."
"Yeah, I got a text from a certain couple of someones in this room tipping me off," he teased.
"Because it's cute when you match! And I knew Shel and I would get our way with the dress," Violeta boasted playfully.
"My stylists," JenniAnn murmured, hugging the girls.
"Thank you for helping out tonight." Andrew embraced the two. "We appreciate it."
"I'm looking forward to it... and to the fudge tomorrow." Violeta looked hopefully at the couple.
Laughing, JenniAnn nodded.
"Just watch your phones. We'll send a photo when we're at the fudge shoppe so you can pick flavors."
"Will do. Now pose! I want a photo." Shelby whipped out her phone and motioned for Andrew and JenniAnn to stand together. "Perfect!"
"Mom's gonna do the same," JenniAnn shared, running her fingers over Andrew's tie. "Not like she had the chance to see me off on dates before."
"Then I will happily pose for more photos." Andrew kissed her hair then squeezed her hands. "Shall we head down? I'll grab our over-night bag."
With a nod, JenniAnn led the four down the stairs where, just as she'd guessed, Allison was waiting with a camera.
After another few photos and hugs and kisses all around, Andrew and JenniAnn got into the Jolly Green and were off.
Following an amazing dinner, Andrew and JenniAnn made their way around the Old Market, hand-in-hand. They admired the architecture, the Christmas lights, and the sound of the city... excited people chattering on their way to shows and dates, street musicians, and the footsteps on the old brick sidewalks.
"You wanna walk through the park?" Andrew suggested.
"Definitely. I've not been through since they updated everything."
Enchanted, the two made their way through the dream-like park until JenniAnn paused.
"Could we sit for a bit? Just... take it all in."
"Absolutely."
Andrew led JenniAnn to a nearby bench then wrapped an arm around her shoulders.
"This night has been perfect..." she cooed.
"It has. I'm so glad your parents arranged this."
"Me too. So... how was your talk with them? I mean... good obviously, but, like, what did you say? If you want to share, I mean."
Andrew's eyes misted as he thought back to the morning.
"Mostly, I just told them that I was sorry for any confusion I caused them by initially saying I couldn't fall in love. And your mom made what I thought was a really apt comparison. She said it was like when you told them you were ace. They understood that you hadn't been lying to them about being straight. You just didn't know yourself. And... I didn't know myself what I was capable of feeling."
"Aww... That is a really good comparison!"
"And... and then your dad told me how grateful they were for me. That... that I'd never intentionally hurt you. That we weren't constantly fighting around the kids. That they'd never had to get you out of an abusive environment. It felt a little awkward... being thanked for just being a good partner... something so basic. Something everyone should be able to expect from their kid's partner. But..."
JenniAnn squeezed his hand.
"But you know too well that not every parent does have that assurance. And, for the record, you are well beyond good. Pretty darn near perfect, actually."
Andrew smiled as JenniAnn nuzzled his shoulder.
"Thank you."
"Just the truth."
Andrew cupped JenniAnn's chin in his hand.
"You're pretty darn near perfect, too, Laja. And... I'm sorry that I probably caused you confusion, too, back then. I just... I didn't know. And, I suppose, I still don't. I mean... I know what I feel but the words... Language fails sometimes." He smiled ruefully. "I know hundreds of them and yet... not one has the perfect set of words. I didn't want to think that what I felt was romantic love because, as beautiful as it can be, I've seen it... fail. Diminish. Die off entirely. Get twisted. And even though the type of love I felt for you changed over the years from brotherly to... to something confusing... to this all-encompassing, incredibly tender love that, yeah, has some hallmarks of romantic love... the thing that didn't change is I couldn't bear for it to be... mortal."
JenniAnn's eyes filled and Andrew wrapped his arms around her.
"But, love... I can't help being mortal."
Andrew tightened his embrace and rested his forehead against hers.
"But... you're not. Not really. You... you'll die, yes. But then the life to come... it's even bigger. Better. Much, much better. But if... if what we felt for each other was romantic love then... then how would I know you'd still feel it then? What I felt... it became such a part of me that I knew it just... there wasn't a future version of me that wouldn't feel it... no matter what you felt... or didn't. So I told myself and you and everyone who would listen that it wasn't romantic. But maybe it was... is... and I just needed to be braver. Because now I know... my Laja, whatever we call it... it's immortal."
JenniAnn nodded effusively then kissed Andrew.
"There will never be a moment... in this life or the next... that I won't love you with all my heart, mind, body, and soul," she vowed.
Andrew returned JenniAnn's kiss then buried his face in her hair.
"I love you, too," he murmured. "Heart... mind... body... soul. Forever and ever."
From a distance, the two heard a street musician beginning to strum on his guitar.
After a few bars, Andrew smiled.
"I know this song. That last Christmas that I spent with Monica, Tess, and Gloria... I felt wistful. So I went to a bar."
JenniAnn raised an eye brow.
"Really seeing a whole new side of you these past twenty four hours," she teased.
Andrew chuckled.
"Relax. I just really liked the fries there. Something they did with parmesan and oil... Anyway, the guy performing there started singing this and I thought it was so beautiful. But it just made me even more wistful... and a little sad as I watched couples dance to it. I found myself wishing... well..."
JenniAnn rose and held her hand out.
"Dance with me?"
"Right here?"
"Obviously."
Beaming, Andrew rose and began to dance with JenniAnn in the middle of the park. As he did, he softly sang.
Andrew and JenniAnn were too caught up in each other to notice a dove fly away from a nearby tree and land near the musician and his companion... two men that Andrew and JenniAnn would have instantly recognized.
The former began to sing, softly enough so that the couple couldn't hear him.
Once the song was finished, the two watched as the couple hurried back through the park, eager to return to their hotel room.
"You're really not going to say anything to them?" Shane asked.
Joshua shook his head and chuckled as he put his guitar in its case.
"No. Tonight's about them. I'll see them on Tuesday."
Shane laughed.
"So we came all the way to Omaha, Nebraska so you could play one song for Andrew and JenniAnn?"
"Naw. We also came for fudge, remember?"
Shane's laughter increased.
"Because New York City is completely devoid of fudge..."
Joshua popped a piece in his mouth.
"Doesn't have this fudge. This fudge is made next door to a Christmas shoppe." He held the box out to Shane.
"So that gives it a distinct flavor, hmm?" Shane teased before taking a bite.
Joshua only shrugged playfully.
"I mean... it is very good," Shane agreed. "And they were very cute..."
Joshua sighed happily.
"They are. And they needed that. Andrew, especially. But now... let's head back to the Green Carnation. Crowley's trying to talk Aziraphale, Marty, and Jamie into singing Queen's 'Thank God It's Christmas.' Don't wanna miss that."
Shane snorted.
"No... no, we don't..."
Then, after a final loving look towards the direction Andrew and JenniAnn had gone, Joshua took Shane's arm and led him to the nearest portal so he could continue celebrating the blessed season with his beloved children, angel and human alike.
After photos were taken, Adam made a show of going back upstairs where he galloped around, hoping to mimic the sound of reindeer preparing to depart whilst playing a recording of sleigh bells. Once he was gone, the family settled into the living room to watch Elf, as chosen by Belle and Avi... everyone except Shelby and Violeta who laid claim to JenniAnn's closet.
Allison fussed over her guests, ensuring they all had what they wanted.
"Andrew, can I get you some egg nog?" she offered.
"Yes, please! That'd be great."
"With or without rum?"
Andrew considered for a moment then cast a look at the staircase which Violeta and Shelby had scurried up.
"Rum, please."
"Coming right up!"
JenniAnn's eye brows raised.
"I had no idea you drank rum."
Andrew shrugged.
"Sometimes."
"You know, I've never seen you drunk. I guess maybe I thought you couldn't be but, well, that incident with Monica... And I saw Crowley drunk."
Before Andrew could answer, Shelby and Violeta came twirling into the room. The former was wearing a very familiar blue crushed velvet dress while the latter was sporting gray corduroy overalls paired with a pink thermal shirt under a maroon flannel one.
"Tonight just might be the night..." Andrew replied.
JenniAnn playfully elbowed him.
"I think you'll be sick to your stomach from the sweetness before the rum would ever hit. Mom doesn't make them very strong."
"What do you think!?" Violeta asked.
"Very 90s cool!" JenniAnn praised, moving to be closer to the girls. "The only thing you're both missing is a choker. We can make some when we're home. Shel... That fits you perfectly! I think I wore that my first Christmas in Asteriana."
"You did," Andrew confirmed, remembering the much smaller group who had gathered in the Willowveil ballroom for candlelit caroling.
"Here you go, dear!" Allison returned and handed the angel his drink.
"Thank you, Allison." Misty-eyed, Andrew took a sip.
"Mama... Come sit with me," Belle pleaded.
"Okay, baby. Just a sec." JenniAnn squeezed Shelby's and Violeta's hands. "You can keep playing dress up if you'd like but I'm gonna sit down. Just try to keep the room tidy enough for Andrew and I to sleep, okay?"
"Okay!" Violeta and Shelby replied in unison before hurrying back up the stairs.
JenniAnn noticed Andrew looking maudlin and reclaimed her seat beside him.
"Come here, Belle. You can snuggle with Daddy and me."
Belle wedged herself between her parents while Avi cuddled up against Andrew's side.
"Ready?" Max asked as he pulled out the DVD.
"Ready!" the others answered.
With that, Max started the movie.
As it began, Andrew took another sip of his egg nog then looked around the room. Everyone looked so cozy and happy. He glanced back over at JenniAnn.
They had come so far in twenty three years...
Avi took Andrew's left hand in both of his.
"It's okay, Daddy. Buddy will find his family," he encouraged.
Andrew smiled at the little boy.
"Thanks, bud."
Avi gave him a relieved smile then focused on the movie, silently urging his dad to do the same.
*~*~*
As JenniAnn had predicted, Andrew was very much sober by the time the two finally returned to their room once Avi and Belle were asleep and Max and his family were well on their way. Shelby and Violeta would be up for a while yet but were definitely not in need of supervision.
Once they were in bed, JenniAnn cuddled up to Andrew and gently stroked his chest.
"What's wrong now?"
Andrew startled.
"Nothing's wrong."
"You can maybe fool everyone else. But not me. Elf has some sentimental moments, sure. But you looked on the verge of tears for practically the whole movie, love. Was it the girls messing around with my clothes?"
"Maybe... a little bit, at least. I dunno... I know they're both strong, resourceful young women. But... they don't really act their age, do they? Not that I think that's bad!" Andrew hastened to add when JenniAnn gave him a look. "I love it. I'm in no hurry for them to fly the coop, believe me. And I love it for them. But just seeing them in your clothes... especially Shelby who looks so much like you... it just hit me that I don't remember you ever looking that carefree, Laja. Do you ever think... I know I didn't mean to but... do you ever feel like maybe I kind of... inadvertently stole your teenage years?"
JenniAnn made a sound that was half-laugh and half-sob.
"What?!" she finally choked out.
"I just mean... you were seventeen... eighteen... and here's this angel of death making regular visits with news of war and disease and abuse and..."
"Okay, first of all, you're forgetting how difficult it was to actually get anything out of you back then. With a precious few exceptions, most of the information I got was just in the form of you confirming whether a particular Touched episode was inspired by a real case or not... which means I was getting info weeks if not months late. But, no, I wasn't a carefree teenager. But that was because I was trying to help grow a community, Andrew! And that would have been the case regardless of whether you were around. It just would have been a whole heckuva lot more difficult without you to share that burden. But I don't regret any of it. If not for those early years, where would we be raising our family? Would we even have a family? So, sure, maybe I get a little wistful seeing Shel and Violeta and their prolonged childhood. But it makes me proud! All good parents sacrifice to make their children's lives more comfortable than their own. And we did that. Together! Before we even knew kids were in the cards. Or this..."
Andrew smiled as JenniAnn kissed him.
"Okay, yeah, I see that now..." he conceded. "And I'm proud of us, too."
"Good. And, for the record, if you did anything to my teenagehood it was prolong it. I mean wasn't it you who picked Crowley and me up at the mall last week after we'd ambled around Hot Topic and then got boba tea? If that's not teenagehood, I dunno what is."
Andrew laughed.
"That was me..."
"Yup. And, also for the record, I can totally understand how trippy tonight was for you. It's a lil surreal for me, too... watching my mini-me parade around in my clothes with the angel of death in training that I helped mother and raise. It sounds absolutely wild. But... that's just part of being a parent. You watch your kids become you kinda. Before Max had really made it on his own, it was kinda weird for me to see him borrowing your suits for interviews and exams and such. It was just... it felt like one day he was a kid and then suddenly he was a mini-you. A grown-up."
Andrew's eyes filled again.
JenniAnn rested her head on his chest for a moment then leaned up and stroked his face.
"I know this weekend has brought up a lot for you... but I suspect that's somewhere at the root of it. It must be weird to, all at once, be very glad that I'm no longer seventeen and yet... want desperately to freeze time and keep Shel and Violeta exactly as they are."
Andrew nodded then nuzzled JenniAnn's hair.
"I feel like I'm long overdue for a talk with your parents but... yeah. Now that you say that... It's a weird tension. I'm glad their daughter is a grown-up woman... but I would prefer mine stay children."
JenniAnn laughed softly.
"Exactly. That's the hypocrisy of being a parent, I guess. You're glad you and your partner grew up despite your parents' wishes and yet... you want to hang onto your own kids and keep them from doing the same. And I imagine that impulse is especially strong with all you see, Andrew. And... we've all spent the last year taking turns accompanying Christina to court... a constant reminder of the ugliness out there. But..." JenniAnn intertwined her fingers with Andrew's then brought his hand to her lips. "There's also a lot of beauty. All that being said... I don't think Shel and Violeta are going anywhere far without us for a good while."
"No... probably not with the way they've been nesting in their room for the past year and a half." Andrew brushed his lips against JenniAnn's temple. "Maybe we should get them the guinea pigs they've been hinting at wanting..."
JenniAnn smirked.
"You said no more animals."
"I can change my mind..."
JenniAnn beamed at the angel.
"Let's sleep on it. How ya doing with the bed?"
Andrew stretched, showing that his feet hung off the bed.
"Aww, sorry!"
Andrew smiled and shook his head then rearranged himself so he was curled around JenniAnn.
"It's okay. I'm actually a lot more comfortable than I thought I'd be."
"Good. Me too. Now... try to sleep well, okay? But wake me up if you need anything."
"Okay but I'm sure I'll be fine. G'night, Laja. I love you."
"I love you, too."
Then with a kiss, and to the faint sounds of Violeta and Shelby chatting across the hall, the two fell asleep.
It was still dark out when Andrew awoke to a cramp in his right calf. Wincing, he did his best to stretch it out but the ache remained. Had he been at Willowveil, he would have gone to the kitchen to get a banana. He considered going through the portal to get one but that felt stupid. Allison and Robert had told them to make themselves at home. They'd probably be offended if they realized he'd gone through the portal, trekked through the yard, retrieved a banana from Willowveil, and trekked back all while a bunch of perfectly ripe bananas sat on their counter.
And so, after carefully extricating himself from JenniAnn's embrace and the bed, Andrew tossed on his robe and made his way down the stairs as quietly as possible. While he was checking on Avi and Belle who were sleeping soundly on the couches, Andrew realized that the kitchen light was on and someone was already up. After another few moments, he could make out Allison's and Robert's voices. He considered going back upstairs but likely they'd heard him come down... and hadn't Adam told him to speak to them, anyway?
"Here goes..." Andrew murmured to himself. He glanced briefly towards the ceiling and whispered a prayer then entered the kitchen.
"Andrew, good morning!" Allison greeted. "It's only 5:30 but can't say I'm surprised to see you. Can I get you anything?"
"Good morning." Andrew smiled at her and Robert. "And a banana would be great, thanks. Dealing with the aftermath of a charlie horse."
"I worried that bed was too small," Robert reported. "Sorry about that."
"No, no! Oh thanks." Andrew accepted a banana from Allison before continuing. "Happens sometimes at home, too. Getting older." He chuckled.
"And... and how's that been?" Allison asked.
Andrew swallowed his first bite of banana then shrugged.
"Not always fun... but I wouldn't have it any other way. It's what needed to happen to give the kids a normal life. JenniAnn, too."
"It was a big sacrifice to make," Allison murmured.
Andrew shook his head.
"I guess I don't really see it that way. Feels like it woulda been a bigger sacrifice to have to deal with people wondering why Belle's dad still looks like a thirty five year old walking her down the aisle. Stuff like that. And I, umm, didn't want people whispering sexist nonsense years from now like JenniAnn being a cougar when, umm, we all know... well, that couldn't be further from the truth."
Robert laughed.
"No... it couldn't be."
Andrew blushed.
"I... I've been thinking... and... I'm sorry. For any confusion I caused you, or JenniAnn for that matter, when this all started. Or before it started or..." The angel dragged a hand through his hair. "All that 'I can't fall in love' stuff and then... I didn't mean to be dishonest. I didn't know..."
Allison's hand shot across the table and took Andrew's fumbling one.
"Andrew... stop. We know. I mean... we don't entirely understand. But I guess we figured it was something like when JenniAnn told us she was asexual. It's not that we think she was lying when she said she was straight for all those years. She just didn't know. It's something she had to discover about herself. And we didn't even know about asexuality in humans."
"I just thought it was a type of reproduction in simple organisms," Robert added.
"Exactly. So if it took JenniAnn a while to figure out she was asexual, I think it makes sense that it took you a while to figure out that you're... well, whatever you are," Allison offered kindly.
Andrew smiled and squeezed her hand.
"Thanks. I really appreciate that. And I am asexual. All angels are. It was just the romance piece... I didn't know about anam caras. If I had... I would have said some things differently. But I'm also glad I didn't know because I wouldn't have wanted to put that expectation on JenniAnn when she was younger because... the truth is I don't know when exactly things changed for me and... and I just wanted her to have a normal life without worrying about me and..."
"And you were never going to be able to do that, Andrew," Allison interrupted. "She loved you. She was always going to worry about you. That's not on you."
Robert sighed and abandoned the potatoes he'd been peeling so he could join his wife and Andrew at the table.
"Listen, I'm not going to pretend that that didn't sometimes bother us. It did. But Allison is right. JenniAnn was going to fret over you no matter what you did or didn't do. That's just the truth. And here's some more truth... I know we haven't always shown it... and we've said and done some things in the past that we shouldn't have but... we are grateful. For you. JenniAnn's never called her mother in tears because you said something hurtful. She's never had to vent because you weren't helping out around the house or with the kids. The kids haven't called us crying because mom and dad are fighting. Half of our friends have had kids return home after a break-up or divorce. More than one has had to sneak their kid out in the middle of the night because of an abusive relationship. But we've never had to do any of that. You've just always been... exactly who our kid needs. And who your kids need. And so... thank you."
A few tears rolled down Andrew's cheeks.
Allison patted his hand.
"We haven't forgotten how you stood up for JenniAnn... against us... when we stayed with you during COVID lockdown. We needed that wake-up call. We know that you feel nervous around us, Andrew. And the fact that you risked making things even more awkward between us because it was more important that JenniAnn be well... that speaks very highly of you. I don't suspect Robert and I will ever fully understand what you two share. But we don't need to to know it's right. And it's holy. And we're grateful that our not-so-little any more girl has that."
Andrew attempted to get out a thank you but was interrupted by a sob.
"Aww, dear..." Allison wrapped her arms around him as Robert patted his shoulder.
And that was the scene JenniAnn walked in on.
"Umm... G'morning... Should I be concerned? Angry? Happy?" she queried.
Andrew gained control of himself enough to laugh and reach out for her.
"Happy, Laja. We just had a long overdue talk."
"Aww... good."
Allison got out of the way so JenniAnn could sit beside Andrew.
"We just talked about how I can understand if I confused them by saying I couldn't fall in love and then, well..."
"And we told Andrew that despite our initial distrust... which we admit lingered for far too long... we are grateful to him. We love him," Allison added.
Andrew sniffled.
"Love you, too... Thanks."
"Of course! And... I think it's time we tell you about the early Christmas present we got you both," Robert tantalized.
Allison clapped her hands happily.
"For starters... We bought some gingerbread house kits to keep the kiddos occupied tonight. And we've talked to Max and Rose and they're very happy to stay here and help out. As for you... We got you a hotel room near the Old Market. We thought you could go have a nice dinner, walk around a bit to admire the lights, and then have a night to yourselves."
"With a king bed," Robert added.
"Oh..." JenniAnn's eyes filled. "I... I love that. Thank you!" She stood up to hug both her parents.
Once again too moved to speak, Andrew silently hugged them, too.
"Well, we remember how hard it sometimes was to find quality time together... and we only had the one kid! You have five and two grandkids!" Allison pointed out.
"And Marty." Robert gave them a quizzical frown. "We still don't understand Marty."
Andrew, at last, was able to speak. He started with a chuckle.
"I'll ask him to stop by to explain himself sometime. In the meantime... thank you both. This..." He beamed over at JenniAnn. "This is the perfect Christmas present. Time."
"Well, it's not entirely unselfish. It also gives us alone time with the kids," Robert pointed out. "But we hope you have a really nice time. I know this one used to find the Old Market to be hopelessly romantic." He playfully tweaked JenniAnn's hair.
"It is so pretty and magical..." JenniAnn hugged her dad again. "We will, of course, have to bring fudge back."
Allison laughed.
"Yes, afraid so. I think Violeta might disown you otherwise. But speaking of food... we better get back to work, Robert."
"Put us to work, too!" JenniAnn insisted.
Andrew nodded.
"Absolutely."
"Well... I suppose you could start cutting up the fruit?" Allison suggested.
"Happily," Andrew agreed as JenniAnn nodded.
With that, the four settled down to their various tasks, happily talking about their plans for the upcoming Christmas week.
*~*~*
That evening, JenniAnn stood in her old bedroom, eyeing her reflection. Among their many finds, Violeta and Shelby had fixated on a purple cocktail dress that they had then insisted she could and should still wear. JenniAnn had put it on just to get them to let it go but now... she found she rather liked the look.
"Can we come see?!" Violeta shouted through the door.
With a smirk, JenniAnn opened the door and let the angel and Shelby in.
"Well?"
"You look so cute!" Shelby gushed. "And it does fit perfectly! Told you so!"
Violeta sniffled and nodded before hugging JenniAnn.
"So pretty... Please say you'll wear it tonight? Andrew's gonna love it."
"I mean... I guess I might as well. You're sure I don't look like I'm trying too hard to look young?" JenniAnn fretted.
"No way!" Shelby gave a resolute shake of her head.
"I think it looks perfectly age appropriate," Violeta agreed.
"Okay, if you're sure..."
A knock on the closet door revealed that Andrew had returned from a stop at Willowveil to grab some nicer clothes.
"Can I come out?"
"Yep."
Andrew stepped out of the closet wearing a dark suit with a purple shirt and a tie of a slightly darker shade.
"Laja..." He admired her.
"We match..."
"Yeah, I got a text from a certain couple of someones in this room tipping me off," he teased.
"Because it's cute when you match! And I knew Shel and I would get our way with the dress," Violeta boasted playfully.
"My stylists," JenniAnn murmured, hugging the girls.
"Thank you for helping out tonight." Andrew embraced the two. "We appreciate it."
"I'm looking forward to it... and to the fudge tomorrow." Violeta looked hopefully at the couple.
Laughing, JenniAnn nodded.
"Just watch your phones. We'll send a photo when we're at the fudge shoppe so you can pick flavors."
"Will do. Now pose! I want a photo." Shelby whipped out her phone and motioned for Andrew and JenniAnn to stand together. "Perfect!"
"Mom's gonna do the same," JenniAnn shared, running her fingers over Andrew's tie. "Not like she had the chance to see me off on dates before."
"Then I will happily pose for more photos." Andrew kissed her hair then squeezed her hands. "Shall we head down? I'll grab our over-night bag."
With a nod, JenniAnn led the four down the stairs where, just as she'd guessed, Allison was waiting with a camera.
After another few photos and hugs and kisses all around, Andrew and JenniAnn got into the Jolly Green and were off.
*~*~*
Following an amazing dinner, Andrew and JenniAnn made their way around the Old Market, hand-in-hand. They admired the architecture, the Christmas lights, and the sound of the city... excited people chattering on their way to shows and dates, street musicians, and the footsteps on the old brick sidewalks.
"You wanna walk through the park?" Andrew suggested.
"Definitely. I've not been through since they updated everything."
Enchanted, the two made their way through the dream-like park until JenniAnn paused.
"Could we sit for a bit? Just... take it all in."
"Absolutely."
Andrew led JenniAnn to a nearby bench then wrapped an arm around her shoulders.
"This night has been perfect..." she cooed.
"It has. I'm so glad your parents arranged this."
"Me too. So... how was your talk with them? I mean... good obviously, but, like, what did you say? If you want to share, I mean."
Andrew's eyes misted as he thought back to the morning.
"Mostly, I just told them that I was sorry for any confusion I caused them by initially saying I couldn't fall in love. And your mom made what I thought was a really apt comparison. She said it was like when you told them you were ace. They understood that you hadn't been lying to them about being straight. You just didn't know yourself. And... I didn't know myself what I was capable of feeling."
"Aww... That is a really good comparison!"
"And... and then your dad told me how grateful they were for me. That... that I'd never intentionally hurt you. That we weren't constantly fighting around the kids. That they'd never had to get you out of an abusive environment. It felt a little awkward... being thanked for just being a good partner... something so basic. Something everyone should be able to expect from their kid's partner. But..."
JenniAnn squeezed his hand.
"But you know too well that not every parent does have that assurance. And, for the record, you are well beyond good. Pretty darn near perfect, actually."
Andrew smiled as JenniAnn nuzzled his shoulder.
"Thank you."
"Just the truth."
Andrew cupped JenniAnn's chin in his hand.
"You're pretty darn near perfect, too, Laja. And... I'm sorry that I probably caused you confusion, too, back then. I just... I didn't know. And, I suppose, I still don't. I mean... I know what I feel but the words... Language fails sometimes." He smiled ruefully. "I know hundreds of them and yet... not one has the perfect set of words. I didn't want to think that what I felt was romantic love because, as beautiful as it can be, I've seen it... fail. Diminish. Die off entirely. Get twisted. And even though the type of love I felt for you changed over the years from brotherly to... to something confusing... to this all-encompassing, incredibly tender love that, yeah, has some hallmarks of romantic love... the thing that didn't change is I couldn't bear for it to be... mortal."
JenniAnn's eyes filled and Andrew wrapped his arms around her.
"But, love... I can't help being mortal."
Andrew tightened his embrace and rested his forehead against hers.
"But... you're not. Not really. You... you'll die, yes. But then the life to come... it's even bigger. Better. Much, much better. But if... if what we felt for each other was romantic love then... then how would I know you'd still feel it then? What I felt... it became such a part of me that I knew it just... there wasn't a future version of me that wouldn't feel it... no matter what you felt... or didn't. So I told myself and you and everyone who would listen that it wasn't romantic. But maybe it was... is... and I just needed to be braver. Because now I know... my Laja, whatever we call it... it's immortal."
JenniAnn nodded effusively then kissed Andrew.
"There will never be a moment... in this life or the next... that I won't love you with all my heart, mind, body, and soul," she vowed.
Andrew returned JenniAnn's kiss then buried his face in her hair.
"I love you, too," he murmured. "Heart... mind... body... soul. Forever and ever."
From a distance, the two heard a street musician beginning to strum on his guitar.
After a few bars, Andrew smiled.
"I know this song. That last Christmas that I spent with Monica, Tess, and Gloria... I felt wistful. So I went to a bar."
JenniAnn raised an eye brow.
"Really seeing a whole new side of you these past twenty four hours," she teased.
Andrew chuckled.
"Relax. I just really liked the fries there. Something they did with parmesan and oil... Anyway, the guy performing there started singing this and I thought it was so beautiful. But it just made me even more wistful... and a little sad as I watched couples dance to it. I found myself wishing... well..."
JenniAnn rose and held her hand out.
"Dance with me?"
"Right here?"
"Obviously."
Beaming, Andrew rose and began to dance with JenniAnn in the middle of the park. As he did, he softly sang.
"'It's always in the
back of your mind,
when everything is dark, still something shines.
One chilly afternoon, you drew the blind...
The earth was frozen,
ice upon the water.
All at once you saw her...
There in the winter light..."
when everything is dark, still something shines.
One chilly afternoon, you drew the blind...
The earth was frozen,
ice upon the water.
All at once you saw her...
There in the winter light..."
Andrew and JenniAnn were too caught up in each other to notice a dove fly away from a nearby tree and land near the musician and his companion... two men that Andrew and JenniAnn would have instantly recognized.
The former began to sing, softly enough so that the couple couldn't hear him.
"'Then the light came
bouncin' up, from stony ground.
And deep within the earth you heard the sound.
Breakin' like a rock, you grew profound.
The earth was frozen,
ice upon the water.
All at once you saw her...
There in the winter light...
There in the winter light...
There in the winter light...
Making everything look beautiful.'"
And deep within the earth you heard the sound.
Breakin' like a rock, you grew profound.
The earth was frozen,
ice upon the water.
All at once you saw her...
There in the winter light...
There in the winter light...
There in the winter light...
Making everything look beautiful.'"
Once the song was finished, the two watched as the couple hurried back through the park, eager to return to their hotel room.
"You're really not going to say anything to them?" Shane asked.
Joshua shook his head and chuckled as he put his guitar in its case.
"No. Tonight's about them. I'll see them on Tuesday."
Shane laughed.
"So we came all the way to Omaha, Nebraska so you could play one song for Andrew and JenniAnn?"
"Naw. We also came for fudge, remember?"
Shane's laughter increased.
"Because New York City is completely devoid of fudge..."
Joshua popped a piece in his mouth.
"Doesn't have this fudge. This fudge is made next door to a Christmas shoppe." He held the box out to Shane.
"So that gives it a distinct flavor, hmm?" Shane teased before taking a bite.
Joshua only shrugged playfully.
"I mean... it is very good," Shane agreed. "And they were very cute..."
Joshua sighed happily.
"They are. And they needed that. Andrew, especially. But now... let's head back to the Green Carnation. Crowley's trying to talk Aziraphale, Marty, and Jamie into singing Queen's 'Thank God It's Christmas.' Don't wanna miss that."
Shane snorted.
"No... no, we don't..."
Then, after a final loving look towards the direction Andrew and JenniAnn had gone, Joshua took Shane's arm and led him to the nearest portal so he could continue celebrating the blessed season with his beloved children, angel and human alike.
The End
Author's Note: Yes, I actually had not one but two large posters of the cast of Friends in my bedroom. I truly don't know why I didn't find this unnerving at the time. Now it seems creepy.
ETA 1-6-24- So that was far more rushed than I would have liked for it to be but I literally went from rushed at the start due to a mouse invasion to rushed at the end due to getting the flu in spite of the flu shot. I've been barely functional for a week and really just needed to get this done so I could knock something off my to-do list. Anyway, for those paying close attention, yes, "Winter Light" is Avi's and Evie's wedding song. But I just really love it and wanted to use it again. Plus, I figure Avi had to have first heard it somewhere. Probably he saw his dad get misty eyed over it one time and that made Avi love the song and, well, the rest is eventual history. Anyway, I hope everyone had a wonderful Christmas and stayed well!
Works Cited:
"Winter Light" by Tim Finn
"She Walks in Beauty" by Lord Byron
Say Anything
Friends
Elf
"Thank God It's Christmas" by Queen
This newsletter is dedicated to John Dye for inspiring this tradition of a Christmas story. Even in recent years when I've had to sometimes write it in stops and starts, it forces me to sit for a bit at least and step away from the chaos that sometimes surrounds the season. For that, I'm grateful!
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(Photo Credits: The photograph used on this page is from Touched by an Angel and owned by CBS Productions, Caroline Productions, and Moon Water Productions. It is not being used to seek profit.)