“What sane person could live in this
world and not be crazy?”
~ Ursula K. LeGuin
I'm just gonna come right out and say that I have zero inspiration or
ambition going into this newsletter. I don't know if it's the
heat or being really busy at work or what. It may stem from
spending a week with my creative impulses being directed to a
drama-near-tragedy. Since then I just haven't felt funny.
None of this is to say that I haven't been highly focused on
Andrew. Believe me, I've been having more than my share of day
dreams. The house next door to me has been empty for months and I
have this whole elaborate daydream wherein Andrew moves in, Vincent
builds a tunnel between the two houses, and Andrew and I spend our
evenings watching sappy
TV or reading aloud whilst
the dogs sit
adorably on the floor. Sigh... if only. And, for the
record, you're all welcome house guests in my daydream. But none
of that really does much in the way of putting together a
Huh. Apparently this must happen with some frequency during the
summer cause looking back at last summer's newsletters, a lot of those
featured material I'd had stashed for months. That actually makes
me feel better! Still not inspired... but better.
Thankfully, Nicole stepped in and sent a list of questions to our
sometimes-beloved, sometimes-despised 8 Ball. Let's see how that
It's been well over a year
since I last wrote with a Magic 8
Ball as my partner! In fact, the last time I did that was in JABB 230.
Unfortunately, I still haven't managed to buy myself a new Magic 8 Ball
since my original one was drained (Mick?). But I'll just go ahead
and consult this one.
Same as last time. Plus, it's so pretty! Thanks again,
Nicole, for all your help!
Me: So, Virtual Magic 8 Ball, that's a pretty long name.
call you something else?
Eight Ball: Most likely.
Me: Umm, okay. Can I call you... Hezekiah?
Eight Ball: It is decidedly
Me: Awesome! So, Hezekiah, do you think... Oh,
yay! My friend, Nicole, is here! She's never got to talk to
you so I'm gonna hand this over to her. Hezekiah, Nicole.
Nicole, Hezekiah. Ya know, on second thought, let's just go with
Nicole: Hi, Jenni.
Hi, 8 Ball. So... 8 Ball,
would you mind if we discussed Andrew?
8 Ball: Outlook not so good.
Jenni: Actually, I find it a lot more reliable than some email
programs but... hey! But we wanna discuss Andrew!!!
Nicole: Like that's going
to stop me! Andrew's really
fantastic and lovely, isn't he?
8 Ball: Most likely.
Nicole: Not very
enthusiastic, is it?
Jenni: No, grrr.
Nicole: 8 Ball, do you
think he'll ever actually show up?
8 Ball: Very doubtful.
Jenni: Must drain 8 Ball...
Nicole: It's virtual,
remember. And I don't think Andrew
would approve. Let's give it a chance to redeem itself.
Okay? Ouch. Did you just run into a wall? You really
need to watch out.
Jenni: Ouch. I get stressed... Andrew... angst...
Nicole: Right... So,
8 Ball, does Dyeland actually exist
8 Ball: It is unlikely.
Nicole: You're right,
Jenni! This is a terrible 8
Jenni: I think so! But one more chance, maybe?
Nicole: Okay. If I
bought the house next door, do ya think
I could persuade Andrew to move in?
Jenni: If it says yes then I'm totally moving in!
8 Ball: Yes.
Jenni: YAY!!! Oooh, but what about...
Nicole: Yes, how about
Adam, 8 Ball?
8 Ball: Yes.
Nicole: AOD moving in
party at the house next door!!!
Jenni: I'll bring the ginger ale!
Nicole: I got the orange
juice. ::sighs:: If only...
Jenni: ::sighs:: Yeah...
Nicole: Are you trained in
Jenni: Umm, no.
Nicole: I was asking the 8
Jenni: Oh right. So... 8 Ball? Trained in psych?
8 Ball: Probably not.
Nicole: Wouldn't it know?
Jenni: I dunno. Some people don't remember much of their
Nicole: I wish Andrew was
a professor at my college... reading
Jenni: Looking all professorial... cuddly sweaters...
vests... ::singing:: If you wanted the sky I would write
across the sky in letters, that would soar a thousand feet high, to
Sir, with love...
Nicole: Which brings me
right to... 8 Ball... well, would
you consider it unhealthy to listen to sappy music and discuss Andrew
multiple nights a week?
8 Ball: My sources say no.
Nicole: Good! Cause,
uh, some people do that... Hey,
do you know when S5 of "Touched by an Angel" is coming out on DVD?
Jenni: Ooh, good one!!!
Nicole: Thanks. So...
8 Ball: It is unlikely.
Jenni: So is it saying that it's unlikely it knows or unlikely
it's going to happen?
Nicole: I don't
know... I hope the first one. They
can't just stop the DVDs!!!
Jenni: Must see Andrew get promoted!
Nicole: Must see Andrew
with baby Lily!!!
Jenni: Bad DVD powers that be, bad!
Nicole: Raising our hopes
only to crush them and then ignore our
many, many pleas!!!
8 Ball: Must see Andrew all
adorable and white shirt wearing in
Jenni: Oh my gosh...
Nicole: 8 Ball, are you an
8 Ball: Sure. I mean
today I am. You don't honestly
think the same person answers this 8 Ball every day, do you? I
just drew the short straw today. I'm really a waitress.
Nicole: No kidding!
8 Ball: And every day I day
dream that I'm going to be pouring
coffee and I'll hear the bell ring at the door and I'll turn around
Jenni: It'll be Andrew.
8 Ball: Exactly...
Nicole: That would be
8 Ball: Definitely.
And I'm sorry about some of the cruddy
answers earlier. I don't have much control over them.
Jenni: That's okay. I'm sorry I called you Hezekiah.
And said I wanted to drain you.
8 Ball: No problem.
Nicole: And I'm sorry I
kept calling you "it." So what is
8 Ball: Mindy.
Jenni: Good to meet you, Mindy.
Nicole: Yeah, so what's
your favorite Andrew memory?
Mindy: Geez. I'm not
sure where to start. I mean
you've got the prayer on the stairs, TDDUP, him dancing with his
Jenni: Facing Jordan and defending Tony...
Nicole: The "Ultimate
Reality" speech in MDWA... Mindy, do
you think we're crazy?
Mindy: Probably not.
Maybe just a lil eccentric. But
Andrew needs someone to be a lil crazy for him. I mean after the
way he sometimes gets pushed to the side on the show.
Jenni: Oh my gosh! Yes!
Nicole: We totally discuss
that all the time!
Jenni: Literally all the time.
Mindy: No one I know even
knows who he is.
Jenni: Poor you.
Nicole: You can talk to us
about Andrew any time you want,
Mindy: Really? So
"Children of the Night" totally kills
me! Seeing him so sad and uncomfortable and...
Nicole: Yeah... He's
Jenni: Love the lovely angel...
Nicole: I heart
Andrew... Amish Boy...
And so Jenni and Nicole spent
hours long into the night telling Mindy
all about Andrew as Amish Boy, Andrew's firstborn issues, and every
adorable thing Andrew ever did either on TBAA or in their angsty,
loyal, swoony minds.