"I arise today, through God's strength to pilot me:
God's might to
uphold me, God's wisdom to guide me,
God's eye to look
before me, God's ear to hear me,
God's word to
speak for me, God's hand to guard me,
God's way to lie
before me, God's shield to protect me,
God's host to
~ from St.
Top o’ the morning (or afternoon or evening) to ya!
Welcome to this year’s St. Patrick’s/ Past Assignments Day
issue! But first I, Jenni, have an announcement.
I've opened a CafePress.com store for JABB. Now you
can show your pride in being a JABB member with T-shirts and
more! You can visit our store at:
The proceeds I get from the store will go towards financing
future contests and other JABB projects. Please let me
know if you have any questions or suggestions for a
shirt. We can't use any copyrighted material but other
than that the sky's the limit!
Now... the newsletter:
Top Ten Things to Do in Dyeland
on St. Patrick’s Day
(It's the Wizard of
Oz! No... it's a leprachaun! No... it's Andrew
after that green ginger ale went to his head!)
10. Dye Andrew’s and Adam’s ginger ale supply
9. Be sure to wish Andrew a happy
anniversary! After all, St.
Day 2000 was when he first met the Dyelanders! I
bet he doesn’t wander around strange fields any more after
8. Sappily recite selections
written by Irish poets W.B. Yeats and Thomas Moore to
Andrew. Might I suggest Yeat’s “He Wishes for the
Cloths of Heaven” and Moore’s “The Meeting Of The Waters“?
7. Beg Andrew to sing “Danny
Boy” as he said he could in “How Do You Spell Faith?”
Ban Monica from doing the same (see “Voice of an Angel“ if
you’re unsure why.)
6. Change the tradition from pinching anyone not
wearing green to kissing anyone not wearing green.
Proceed to confiscate all green items from Andrew’s
5. Get a wee bit tipsy and sing all those fantastic
Irish torch songs while casting furtive glances Andrew-way.
4. Host a dance! Sure, we know Andrew can rumba
and tango but can he Ceili dance? I wanna know!
3. Because it’s also his Dyeland anniversary, send
Andrew Irish-themed anniversary cards. Might I suggest
messages like “I love you… even if you are older than the
tombs of Carrowmore!” or “I wear my Claddagh ring with the
heart facing out on my left hand… just for you!” or my
personal favorite “Happy anniversary! Dyeland with out
you is like U2 with out Bono. So glad you came our
2. And to the sane people… GET ANDREW OUT OF DYELAND
NOW!! Seriously, boy’s gonna go into saccharine shock
if left around the poetry-spouting, kissing,
single-but-committed Claddagh-wearing Dyelander set!
1. Replace Andrew’s baseball bat with a shillelagh and
go pervert’s-computer-bashing in true Irish style!
Now for some...
There was once a lad named Andrew
He was once feeling just a tad blue
So he went for a walk in a field of gold
Girls there saw he was a sight to behold
Now he’s beloved by the whole Dyeland crew!
watch out! Looks like Adam has a new friend!)
Adam the angel was a
most sensitive soul
When Tess brought him a turkey whole
Well, ol Tess said “Kill it, we wanna eat.”
But poor Adam could do no such feat
So what ended up in the dinner role?
TBAA was a show of
very great renown
But then the end came and we all did frown
No more Andrew to smile nor speak nor love
Yet he seems to live on both here and above
So, guess ya just can’t keep a good angel down!
(Andrew vents to
Monica after another St. Patrick's Day in Dyeland.
Awww... Poor baby!!)
So a happy and safe St. Patrick’s Day to you
all! Apparently in a moment of mental unclarity, I
dubbed March 20th “Past Assignments Day.” Why I put a
made-up holiday right by a traditional one… I have no
idea. In any case, on “Past Assignments Day” we fondly
(or not so fondly) remember Andrew’s past assignments.
As with last year, I’m going to let Lady JenniAnn handle
this particular celebration. She will be
presenting you all with material from Andrew’s very own
scrapbooks which she obtained by… I really don’t want to
know. So you can see what she managed to snag this
Thanks for reading and be sure to check your email again
about 2 weeks from now for JABB 188!
(Photo Credits: The photographs used on this page are
from "Touched by an Angel" and owned by CBS Productions,
Caroline Productions, and Moon Water Productions.
They are not being used to seek profit.)