Click Here
to Listen to
"Evening Falls" by Enya
Hi all, sorry for the
lateness of this newsletter though we suspect none of you were tearing
around your homes, clawing out clumps of hair, and screaming "WHERE IS
JABB!?" However, as we realize we have a very diverse group here, such
people may be among us. If you were indeed acting as such our deepest
apologies for causing you distress. So, first we'd like to offer
reasons for our tardiness in the form of a top ten (or top whatever
number our overstressed brains can come up with). Then we'll give you
tips on how to handle TBAA's impending departure.
Top Ten Reasons this Newsletter is Late
10. We had
midterms and were too busy writing essays and buying bluebooks and
number 2 pencils to write JABB.
9. We did write a newsletter but, as stressed as we were we forgot what
JABB stood for and ended up writing an issue of the John Adams
Braintree Bulletin which we promptly emailed to the deans of our
schools in an embarrassing emailing snafu.
8. We asked Andrew to write the issue for us but he left to go on
assignment without writing so much as one word. The nerve of some
angels!
7. We were sidetracked and couldn't help contemplating the recent
radical hair changes of both Adam and Andrew. Methinks the AODs are up
to something...
6. At least one of us was thrown into some sort of crazed day long 80s
flashback. Bring back ALF!!
5. We were busy trying to master Jedi mind control as a last ditch
effort to get the TBAA writers to come up with an Andrew goes to jail
story line. Don't believe we have mastered the trick? We'll prove it.
With in the last five seconds you thought of either a favorite show or
song from the 80s. Ha!
4. We had to spend time reconnecting with our inner Androoler and
cooing to ourselves "To drool is to live."
3. We were trying to solve the mystery of the amazing
disappearing-reappearing facial hair of Andrew. Current theory:
Inspired by Clark Kent, he thinks none of us will recognize him with
the facial hair and hence stop stalking him around Dyeland or on his
assignments.
2. We were busy trying to
surreptitiously find out whether Andrew would still be with us
post-TBAA.
1. ANDREW!!!! PLEASE STAY!!!! I LOVE YOU!!!
(Reason number 1 was written by only one of the co-presidents without
the okay of the other. We'll let you decide whether it was the work of
Audrey or JenniAnn :-)
Okay, well a few weeks ago we had our resident advice columnist give us
a few tips on how to deal with TBAA leaving the air. She was helpful
but we felt more needed to be said on this issue. Here are more tips.
Some actions were actually done by JABB authors, some weren't. You be
the judge.
1. Write Andrew a letter expressing your gratitude for the past years
and your thankfulness. Do not mail it lest it end up in the Dear
Santa/Dear God/Dear Elvis pile.
2. Start hiding select copies of TBAA episodes and promise you won't
watch them until September. Then whack yourself on the head a few
times. By September you won't remember the episodes and they'll seem
like new ones! You also may not remember other things but that's a
small sacrifice to make for TBAA, right? :-)
3. Write your personal history with TBAA. How you found the show, why
you kept watching it, what it meant to you at various stages of your
life. It's just a nice, comforting thing to do.
4. Just run around screaming for a while. No reason really. Just fun.
5. Cry. Or at least if you feel like it, don't feel embarrassed. You
won't be the only one.
